Filtering technology is often seen as a potential solution to the problem of online pornography use. On the surface, it appears to be a simple and effective way to prevent people from accessing pornographic material. However, in reality, filters are not always reliable or comprehensive enough to block all forms of pornographic content. Furthermore, these filters can also limit access to essential and educational information that can be beneficial.
The underlying problem
However, more importantly, while filters may block a percentage of the content accessible, they fail to address the true, underlying problem of pornography consumption. The truth is, as is taught by Dann Aungst, President and founder of Road to Purity, is that porn is not about porn! It is very frequently about something deeper. Porn or other methods of consuming impure content or even experiencing promiscuous behavior is more truthfully a medication or coping mechanism.
Consuming porn is most often a reaction to mask a deeper personal emotional wound or brokenness. i.e a man who has a self-perception of unworthiness and being unwanted due to past experiences, most often from childhood, is desperately seeking to feel loved and wanted. Pornography, adultery, fornication, etc are all methods to seek acceptance and value. Logically, it seems to not make sense because if you’re paying for a person to “act” like they want to be with you or you’re knowingly committing a grave sin to engage in the act of an affair, it reveals the extremely desperate need to feel loved and wanted. This is precisely the premise behind G.K Chesterton’s quote “Every man who stands at the doorstep of a brothel is looking for God”.
Looking for love
God is the ultimate source of this love. An unconditional love that God Himself wired us for! This also reveals the fact that at it’s root, any habit, compulsion, or addiction of sexual impurity is a spiritual disorder. We are really looking for God!
A tool only
Ultimately, it is important to remember that filters are an important tool to assist in avoiding the temptation WHILE a person is looking to dig deeper and heal the true, underlying issue.
Exception
While the explanation above is the general rule when we at Road to Purity counsel a person who says they cannot stop looking at pornography, we must also acknowledge the typically younger audience who may be introduced to pornography in many various ways, is curious, and investigates more. Because pornography is sex, which God made us to be intensely interested in, any person, who does not know the authentic purpose of sex, will very likely be attracted to the images and scenes.
The pure dopamine rush and enjoyment of the behavior can be quickly habit-forming before becoming addictive. A twelve-year-old who discovers porn by accident when searching on the internet, or a peer shows him at school, can become deeply enticed by the excitement and entertainment of pornography. If he is not educated properly by parental figures, then he has no reason to report the incident or simply avoid the temptation. When this happens, the pleasure of pornography can quickly become an escape when events like life at school, getting in trouble at home, or doing poorly at school. This is then the beginning of an addictive behavior.
For these reasons it is extremely advisable for all parents to continually talk to their children about sex, God’s plan for us, Theology of the Body, and even with age-appropriate language about pornography. A few recommended resources are a video by Dann Aungst: “How to Talk to Your Kids About Porn” and the Children’s Theology of the Body Resources from TOBET (Theology of the Body Evangelization Team)”.
What if I may already be addicted?
If you feel that you are already addicted, or at least have a compulsion that you can’t stop, then the best Catholic resource available is the Restoring God’s Foundation program. This program is available in an independent study version and an edition for each of men and women. And it’s also available in a small group format ideal for parishes and men’s groups.
An excellent supplement to these, or even stand-alone for some, is the accountability community The Simon Community.
Am I addicted?
Ever wonder if you may be addicted? Take the secure, anonymous quiz on the Road to Purity website.
Filters can be good, but you must do more
Don’t just rely on filters and parental controls – these are not a cure-all solution when it comes to pornography use online. They can help but should be used as part of a comprehensive approach to addressing online pornography
Resources
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